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Thursday, March 31, 2011

It's Scary When It's Quiet

It's Scary When It's Quiet




Having such a challenging week! (sarcastic tone.)  But I guess it is not time to curl up in a ball...rocking in a corner just yet.
My eldest son is on Camp.  A Year 7 leadership adventure down in the New South Wales Hinterland, at "Camp Good Enough!".  He would be having a great time doing Archery, canoeing, not sleeping, pranking teachers, camp fires, all the usual stuff kids get up to. But that leaves just me and the youngest.  Even though I love spending some quality time with my little guy, I must say the conversation is a little sparse.  As is, we don't get a two-way conversation rolling, but at present he is going through his "Spanish" stage thanks to Dora the Explorer and Diego. He is reciting phrases, counting and greeting people all in Spanish... FANTASTICO!
The house the quieter than normal, come to think of it cleaner too!  At first it was a welcome change. The peace and serenity of no televisions blaring, no arguments, no back-chatting or trouble making giggles. But the novelty has well and truly worn off.  I didn't realise how much I missed my eldest until he was at camp.  He is my conversation. I ask about school, what he is learning, jokes, social gossip amongst friends etc.  We will talk about choices for dinner and cook together, plans for the weekend etc. I think I am even starting to miss his one-sided thinking and the way he will argue with me over the drop of a hat!  All the seeming-less family chatter many people have... they do not realise what a precious gift that is.... just to talk. 
I am even missing my son's independence. His ability to shower himself, dress himself, organise his school bag, sometimes lunch (If he is on a roll!)  Most of the time I always hear myself nagging him, to help out more....but now that he isn't here... I can see how much he does. How much he helps me with his younger brother. I really didn't think how much I rely on him.  WOW....... that has hit home. I think I've just had an 
(OMG moment.... kid slang!)

At times I ponder, carrying guilt over the home responsibilities placed on my eldest. But I really don't think it is any different from the requirements needed by; larger families, or families who have working parents, with younger siblings or other families who have siblings with needs. A home is about helping each other and doing what you can. All pitching in to work as a team. You do lean on each other, that is what a loving family is all about.


One of most favourite quotes of all time......





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