TIME FOR INTERVENTION.

TIME FOR INTERVENTION.

When you find yourself fighting with your child over irrational, unimportant things (e.g  a Milo Tin).... you know it is time for a INTERVENTION.

Time to take stock of what your body and mind is telling you.....  

and in my case tonight;

- nearing the 8th day of very minimal sleep - yes the youngest is still suffering from his head cold.

- not having my usual Respite help of a few hours through the week - due to the snot monster!

- not getting my usual 1 hour walk in each day to clear my mind, energize and help to deal with everyday stress.

- Tradies (tradesmen) early morning calls, constructing, not finishing and rescheduling.

- Rushing to and from Doctors and Chemists... trying to find some way to help alleviate the head cold my youngest is suffering from, which has turned into a 10 day nightmare.

-Staying on top of the extra household duties required when you have sick kids.

-Study.

-Home duties... again, with the snotty one, which can I say is a very draining exercise.....

no wonder why I am fighting with my eldest son over ridiculous things, 

snapping and feel so irritable. This afternoon, all of those things accumulated, I exploded and basically, had a TANTRUM.  Sick and tired of the work load, lack of sleep, constant demands and unwell kids..... I lost the plot!  I was cranky... nagged, complained.... I am honestly surprised I didn't throw myself onto the floor kicking and screaming.  I was acting very much like a "terrible toddler!"

Now I am certainly not proud of my display this afternoon and Yes... the mother

guilt is kicking in.  But I guess after I had apologised

to my eldest son and realised how ridiculous my actions were.... I think 

I immediately knew I needed to do something to change my mindset.

When you are stuck at home with a sick child, you just do not get a break. I had tried to Meditate through the week.  Tried to complete a Yoga and Pilates DVD ... just to steal 15-20 mins for myself. Tried to re-centre my thinking and strength.  Tried to get some relaxing time on my day bed reading a book. But in the end, all of these things failed... 

obviously, hence the tantrum.  

Now I am very aware that with the youngest still too unwell to return to school tomorrow, and the weekend looming. With no help or respite in sight until Monday and more tradies to finish the mess they started, early on Saturday morning - I needed an action plan. Just so I will be able to cope with the weekend ahead.

Contemplating my options; In hoping those tradesmen will do a fast efficient job... was just a pipe dream!  Sleeping in or catching up on sleep was a possibility, but if the past week was anything to go by, a low chance of this occurring.  A few glasses of vino at night to help relax the mind and soul, could be good choice, but in honesty, will only result in a very prolonged hang-over. I think really, simplicity is needed here.  After a heart to heart chat with my eldest just about the difficulties one faces when parenting on their own. When trying to be everywhere at once and achieve the impossible all the time, discussing the fact that it is no-one's fault.... life sometimes throws challenges our way, that is to be expected. We both came to the conclusion that I need to ask for help.  

I loathe doing this.... it goes against all my STUBBORN views of

"I can do this.... I need no help.... I've got it under control!"

But when the above views, begin brewing stress and anxiety in the home... something needs to change and really let's face it....we all need help at some point.  

Thinking of some very wise advice from friends, my son and I sat down and chatted about some ways in which I could "relax".  This was such a

huge moment... coming from my Asperger's child. Recognising that I have needs and then problem solving, how my needs could be met?

WOW..... he really is growing up.

I can only hope and pray that these moments are etched into my son memory when he is faced with a similar challenge.